Today has been a very wonderful day.
What was so wonderful about it?
Was it that I got socks for 75 cents?
Tried some new Smores flavored coffee creamer?
Lit brand spankin' new candles?
Yes, yes but there's even more!
Let me tell you.
I woke up this morning feeling pretty overwhelmed with things to do. I had a meeting I to go to at 9:00 and woke up at 7:00 already dreading the day to come. Not that I wasn't looking forward to seeing friends or learning new information at the meeting, but I just wanted to be done with "stuff" for awhile. Not even anything in particular I just couldn't imagine putting my heart into anything. I got on the road a little late, but made surprisingly good time...until I realized I forgot my phone...which had my directions to the meeting and all my phone numbers. I had also left it at home which was 30 minutes from where I was now. So I wandered around a neighborhood for awhile hoping to find a car I recognized...no such luck.
At this point I was still ready to quit everything I was committed to and maybe move to Antarctica. (I'd say Hawaii, but I'm really looking forward to scarf and boot season, so I thought Antarctica would be a nice place.) I turned my little blue car around and headed back toward the freeway, feeling a little upset and a little bit free. I started praying and asking God what on earth to do with my life. "God, I don't know what to do. I don't know how to do anything right now. I don't know what You want. I don't know what anyone wants. I don't even know how to get anywhere." A song came on the radio by the one and only John Waller...
I wish I could see just three steps in front of me,
But the lamp unto my feet, only moves when I take a step
And I believe Your Word to me, Lord you have a history
That proves You're worthy of my faith
It's the evidence of things I cannot see
And faith its the confidence that You're holding me
Its stepping out, breaking through all my doubts
And all I thought I knew 'cause You've never lived
Til you've lived by faith...
Faith.
That's all God wants of me.
Just trust.
Trust Him.
So, yes, today was a good day. I don't really think that God uses the new common word, "Boom." (you know? "you got a pumpkin spice latte..for free? boom." "it only took me 2 hours to do all my homework. boom." ya know what I'm sayin?), but if God did say boom, I think after I heard that song He would have said, "Boom. I gotcha girl. Don't worry." And even though I didn't hear those words a peace came over to my heart today that let me know that God does have it under control and no matter what chaos we find ourselves in - He is there, and He will never give us more than we can handle.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Always There
For the past 3 or 4 four years I've had a lot of opportunities to give my testimony, and it has varied quite a bit at various times. About a month ago I had the chance to talk with one of my good friends about what God had been doing in my life, and I realized that I had been telling my story of faith wrong. I based it a lot on myself without meaning to. I struggled a lot in high school and I thought that kept me from God's love, but what I realized was God has been drawing me further in and closer to Him since the day I asked Him to be Savior when I was only five.
The best way I could think of to explain this was using the stories about Narnia. The children journey to Narnia and fall in love with the lion king Aslan, and he always calls them further into the adventure. Finally, in the last book he calls them further in one last time, and they reach "Aslan's Country." The Pevensie children go through many wonderful times and many struggles on their journey, but each time find themselves closer to their king and closer to the time they get to stay with him forever.
During my life I've had times when I wanted Jesus to be my best friend forever, and I wanted to give everything I am to Him. However, at other times I've wanted to be done with this Christianity stuff and couldn't have cared less what He thought about what I did or what He had done for me. Am I proud of those times? No, no I'm not, but I believe God was still drawing me closer through those times. No matter where my own heart was - God was still next to me. Loving me. Waiting for me. Calling me to come further in.
My heart echoes the cry of King David, "For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth. Upon you I have leaned from before your birth; you are he who took me from my mother's womb...O God, from my youth you have taught me, and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds." - Psalm 71:5-6, 17
There may be times in your life when you think that maybe God wasn't there or He didn't care anymore. Maybe because you had messed up or because the world itself seemed messed up. But I think you'll find that as you look back at your life there was never a step where God left you. He was there - leading you to the place you needed to be. He will never leave you. And He will never forsake you.
The best way I could think of to explain this was using the stories about Narnia. The children journey to Narnia and fall in love with the lion king Aslan, and he always calls them further into the adventure. Finally, in the last book he calls them further in one last time, and they reach "Aslan's Country." The Pevensie children go through many wonderful times and many struggles on their journey, but each time find themselves closer to their king and closer to the time they get to stay with him forever.
During my life I've had times when I wanted Jesus to be my best friend forever, and I wanted to give everything I am to Him. However, at other times I've wanted to be done with this Christianity stuff and couldn't have cared less what He thought about what I did or what He had done for me. Am I proud of those times? No, no I'm not, but I believe God was still drawing me closer through those times. No matter where my own heart was - God was still next to me. Loving me. Waiting for me. Calling me to come further in.
My heart echoes the cry of King David, "For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth. Upon you I have leaned from before your birth; you are he who took me from my mother's womb...O God, from my youth you have taught me, and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds." - Psalm 71:5-6, 17
There may be times in your life when you think that maybe God wasn't there or He didn't care anymore. Maybe because you had messed up or because the world itself seemed messed up. But I think you'll find that as you look back at your life there was never a step where God left you. He was there - leading you to the place you needed to be. He will never leave you. And He will never forsake you.
Friday, September 7, 2012
New Chapter
And so it begins...I am officially living the live of an in-betweener.
My summer team work is finished.
I moved into my first apartment.
I started a new job.
School is on the back burner.
And...
I'm not sure what to do with myself.
All I know is this will be a year like nothing I've experienced before. Something that God has been teaching me is that to live for yourself, well, it's not really a fulfilling life. I'm curious to see what God has in store, and I feel like this lesson will continue for quite sometime. I'm sure it will be a painful lesson at times, but I also know that it will be filled with joy - because, really, God is joy - so to follow God means that there will be joy. And hope. And peace. I can't wait to start sharing the adventures He leads me to...but for now I think I'll go have a cup of coffee with my mom.
My summer team work is finished.
I moved into my first apartment.
I started a new job.
School is on the back burner.
And...
I'm not sure what to do with myself.
All I know is this will be a year like nothing I've experienced before. Something that God has been teaching me is that to live for yourself, well, it's not really a fulfilling life. I'm curious to see what God has in store, and I feel like this lesson will continue for quite sometime. I'm sure it will be a painful lesson at times, but I also know that it will be filled with joy - because, really, God is joy - so to follow God means that there will be joy. And hope. And peace. I can't wait to start sharing the adventures He leads me to...but for now I think I'll go have a cup of coffee with my mom.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Reminders of True Joy
The week of rest is now over half gone, and the summer is about to begin.
I was out on our front porch a couple nights ago. Summer nights are one of my favorite things - when the sun goes down, and the air finally cools. Nothing can beat curling up with a blanket and a book. Unfortunately, there's a motion sensitive light on our porch so the relaxation has to be interrupted every 5 minutes or so with frantic movement to get the light to turn back on - but even this can be overlooked:)
I was sitting outside that night when God showed me a few things I needed to remember.
The first was a reminder that even though it's incredibly hard for me to say good-bye - He has wonderful things in store for my future. I graduated from AFLBS this past Saturday, and it was one of the saddest days of my life, but God's been showing me the blessings of friendship He's given me throughout every step of life. Even though saying good-bye to this chapter of life is sad, He truly has blessed me with lifelong friends. My pastor mentioned the sadness some of us experienced at graduation and followed it with this line, "you can't become the person you were made to be unless you leave."
True. Hard. But True.
I'm excited to see what God has in store next!
Which leads me to the next revelation of the night.
I had been reading from Acts 3 and was just getting into the story of the lame man who sat outside the gate each day. This man was waiting for something to happen - but had resigned himself to hoping only for money each day. Peter and John walked by with no money to offer, but they had something so much greater. Through the power of Jesus Christ they gave this man his legs back! Something the man probably did not even bother to hope for! I just read the verse, "He jumped to his feet and began to walk. Then he went into the temple courts, walking and jumping, and praising God!" ...and then the motion sensitive light went out. I didn't feel like wiggling around to get it to come back on, so I just sat still in the darkness and thought about the man's joy. Then it was as if God said, "Get up, Steph, get up and rejoice!" I'm about to head into a summer of teaching little kids about the love of Jesus, and I can't wait to be with them, to laugh with them, and to love them. The only reason I can do any of this is because of Jesus Christ, and what He has done on my life. I'm so grateful for the love He has shown!
...And now as I continue my week of rest I sit and watch the movie I was obsessed with as a child. The Chronicles of Narnia: the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. I've been quoting random lines and shocking my mom with my vast knowledge of the movie. It's been a good day!
I was out on our front porch a couple nights ago. Summer nights are one of my favorite things - when the sun goes down, and the air finally cools. Nothing can beat curling up with a blanket and a book. Unfortunately, there's a motion sensitive light on our porch so the relaxation has to be interrupted every 5 minutes or so with frantic movement to get the light to turn back on - but even this can be overlooked:)
I was sitting outside that night when God showed me a few things I needed to remember.
The first was a reminder that even though it's incredibly hard for me to say good-bye - He has wonderful things in store for my future. I graduated from AFLBS this past Saturday, and it was one of the saddest days of my life, but God's been showing me the blessings of friendship He's given me throughout every step of life. Even though saying good-bye to this chapter of life is sad, He truly has blessed me with lifelong friends. My pastor mentioned the sadness some of us experienced at graduation and followed it with this line, "you can't become the person you were made to be unless you leave."
True. Hard. But True.
I'm excited to see what God has in store next!
Which leads me to the next revelation of the night.
I had been reading from Acts 3 and was just getting into the story of the lame man who sat outside the gate each day. This man was waiting for something to happen - but had resigned himself to hoping only for money each day. Peter and John walked by with no money to offer, but they had something so much greater. Through the power of Jesus Christ they gave this man his legs back! Something the man probably did not even bother to hope for! I just read the verse, "He jumped to his feet and began to walk. Then he went into the temple courts, walking and jumping, and praising God!" ...and then the motion sensitive light went out. I didn't feel like wiggling around to get it to come back on, so I just sat still in the darkness and thought about the man's joy. Then it was as if God said, "Get up, Steph, get up and rejoice!" I'm about to head into a summer of teaching little kids about the love of Jesus, and I can't wait to be with them, to laugh with them, and to love them. The only reason I can do any of this is because of Jesus Christ, and what He has done on my life. I'm so grateful for the love He has shown!
...And now as I continue my week of rest I sit and watch the movie I was obsessed with as a child. The Chronicles of Narnia: the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. I've been quoting random lines and shocking my mom with my vast knowledge of the movie. It's been a good day!
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Will She Write
I've always enjoyed writing, and to be honest, I've started various blogs in the past. I believe my first one was my 7th grade study hall pastime! Those were good times, but needless to say that blog didn't last long once school ended that year. I'd like to say that this one will last - however, I am making no promises to myself or others. We'll just do this one post at a time.
I decided to make this page to keep all those I've asked to pray for my summer updated on what God's doing. I'm going to be traveling with a team of three others and teaching Vacation Bible School all summer, and I'm pretty excited! We start training in eight days, and then we're off for 10 weeks. It's going to be crazy, and I can't wait to see what's in store. I know there are going to be many, many memories by the time August rolls around!
I decided to make this page to keep all those I've asked to pray for my summer updated on what God's doing. I'm going to be traveling with a team of three others and teaching Vacation Bible School all summer, and I'm pretty excited! We start training in eight days, and then we're off for 10 weeks. It's going to be crazy, and I can't wait to see what's in store. I know there are going to be many, many memories by the time August rolls around!
Cornerstone 2012
Michelle, Steph, Paul, and Steven
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